Melt The Glass Ceiling

Answering Your Leadership Questions: Essential Tips for Success

• Lisa M. LIszcz, Ph.D. • Season 1 • Episode 10

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🎙️ In this engaging podcast episode, Lisa Liszcz, Ph.D., leadership and career coach, tackles listener-submitted questions on leadership challenges with a professional yet fun approach.

Key themes include:

Leadership and Behavior: 🌟 Emphasizing that leadership is about behaviors, Lisa highlights the importance of setting clear expectations and modeling professional behaviors. 🧭

Effective Delegation: 📋 Offering insights on delegating tasks, Lisa underscores clear communication, regular check-ins, and viewing delegation as a developmental opportunity. 🚀

Building Relationships: 🤝 Lisa stresses the value of trust and camaraderie, advising leaders to invest time in building strong, collaborative relationships and offers practical tips on how to do that. 💡

Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their practices and implement these strategies to enhance their leadership effectiveness. 🌟✨

🥳 And don't forget to download your freebies and sign up to learn more here 🎉✅:


Lisa:

Hello, this week we are talking about your leadership questions. I have had quite a few people sending me questions about leadership. A couple weeks ago I did an episode on Leadership 101, key Skills for Women in Leadership for Success, and thank you so much for sending in your questions about the topic. I appreciate that and I got some great questions. I'm going to address three of them today, three of the questions that came in and that I thought were very relatable for a lot of us. Before we dig into the questions, remember that leadership is really about behaviors. Once we get clear on the skills of leaders, we translate those skills into behaviors and we take action, and behavior is anything you do or say. It includes your body language, it includes all the actions that you take. So leadership is really about behaviors and to be successful, you need the right skills so that you can demonstrate behaviors that will support your success in a leadership role. So that's just a quick review of episode nine, where we went through key characteristics of successful leaders. Let's talk about some of the questions that I had come in. First of all, I had a great question. It was actually from a member in our private Facebook group for professional women. I've got the link to that group in the show notes, so check that out if you are so inspired, because I love getting questions like this in the Facebook group, where I can answer and give some thoughts, but others also give their thoughts and advice and perspective and we hash out what might be one of the best answers to your question or your issue and it's friendly and it's supportive. So check that out.

Lisa:

I had this question come in from one of our private Facebook members how can I get my employees to have manners? And it sounds simple at first, but I understand the question. We're all raised differently. We've had different experiences, we've been exposed to different opportunities to learn about how to interact socially and how to interact with others in different environments. So how can I get my employees to have manners? First of all, I love the honesty in this question because clearly there's a perception that my employee doesn't have any manners, and so what do we do with that? I have a few thoughts initially and I'm very interested in your thoughts. I always like it when I get a direct message from you, from the listeners, and I also appreciate getting emails, so feel free to reach out to me if you have some initial thoughts on getting your employees to have manners.

Lisa:

And first of all, we need to just set that expectation and communicate a clear expectation that our employees interact with others in a certain way on professional etiquette and office etiquette. And maybe going through a couple of these chapters and being very clear about expectations in a staff meeting, sharing that with the team in general is a great way to approach the subject and start having an open conversation about manners and what that means. So let's talk about what having manners means. What you're really talking about is certain expectations around behavior with customers, with clients, with stakeholders, with co-workers, bosses, employees that we exhibit a professional level of manners and interpersonal behavior. So being very clear about what that means is the first step. Setting that very clear expectation what is the tone of voice that we use? What is the language that we use? Do we work in an environment where there's no cussing? Do we work in an environment where we don't use slang? Do we work in an environment where we look people in the eye when we talk to them, where we listen when someone is talking and ask questions? Go ahead and set those expectations. And when are you going to set those expectations? Look, I would set those expectations during the interview process. I would write up that expectation in the job description when you post the job and you're looking to fill the job.

Lisa:

In interactions with colleagues, co-workers, supervision, customers, clients, stakeholders, constituents, everyone. I work with some organizations that are not-for-profit and if you have donors, we want to exhibit professionalism and manners with our donors. If we are working in a for-profit organization and we work with customers or we work in customer service or we work with community leaders, but even with our colleagues, with our boss, with our employees, with volunteers, we want to exhibit a certain level of professional behavior and that is exhibited by a person's language, body language, the words that they use, the tone that they use. So setting very clear expectations of that during the hiring process as well as as soon as that person comes on board to their job, is very important, is critical to your success. If you did start there, it's not too late. Don't throw away the baby with the bathwater.

Lisa:

If you have weekly staff meetings, this is a great time to say I want to brush off a very important professional skill and that is exhibiting manners and using proper business etiquette and being able to say we may work in a casual environment, but we don't want to get so casual that people are offended. So let's talk about showing each other respect, demonstrating proper manners, that if we have a meeting and it's over lunch, what is table etiquette and what does that look like? And open up the discussion and start sharing your expectations and just set a baseline for everyone in terms of what it is that you expect as their leader. And then, if you need to go a little bit deeper with a few people, go ahead and have those one-on-one conversations and be very clear and professional yourself. And this brings me to another point Are you exhibiting the behaviors that you desire? Are you, as we say, modeling the way we want you to model, the way we want you to be the role model for what's appropriate in this work environment? So you set the example and then you coach people, you give people feedback, you catch them doing things right and acknowledge them for exhibiting the correct behavior.

Lisa:

This question was about getting your employees to have manners, but this really applies to any expectation that you have of your employees. Do you expect them to be on time? Do you expect them to finish their tasks on time? Do you expect them to come to you for help when they need it or if they have a question, or to get feedback when they're midway through a particular task or project. Go ahead and set those expectations. It is your responsibility as the leader to help develop people, help them to know how they achieve what your expectation is, and the best way you can help them is by starting out by sharing and being very clear about that expectation, whether that's about manners or it's about something else.

Lisa:

So the next question that I got is about what do we do when we delegate a task and it comes back very badly. Let me tell you a little story about how this came up, and this was with a one-on-one VIP client that I work with and she delegated a task to her team. She has a work team that she leads and manages, and I think there are six or seven people on the team and she gave them the task of developing project recommendation. She outlined the task, she gave them 30 days and on the last day of that month the project was due and it came in and she was extremely disappointed in what it was that her team submitted to her. She was so disappointed in their ideas and how they put everything together and then how they wrote up their recommendations and submitted their proposal to her. She was just thoroughly disappointed. She said the product was not usable and now she was up against a deadline and really their failure was going to be her failure, which is what happens when we delegate a task or a project to an individual or a group. We are still responsible. We are still accountable for that work product that doesn't go away. We are responsible. So she delegated a task in this case, really more of a project, I think and it came back really badly.

Lisa:

What do we do as a leader when that happens? First of all, let's talk about avoiding the situation to begin with, and there are a few ways to do that. There are a few ways to accomplish that and avoid and prevent this from happening in the first place. First of all, remember that delegating is not dumping. You don't give it to somebody and then just walk away until it's due. The first step in delegating is in making it very clear how what you're delegating is part of your employee's professional development plan. Explain to them how this is going to help them develop in their career. Is this a report that you do all the time as part of your job and you're giving them the opportunity to do this report so that they learn more about this part of the work in the department and they learn about the work at a higher level and they learn about what your senior leadership asks for and needs in terms of information. This is a developmental opportunity for them.

Lisa:

So let's say that this is a project proposal that you've given, in this case, to a team of people. Explain to them why this is important on the larger scale, in the bigger picture of what is going on in the company. Explain to them who the audience ultimately is on in the company. Explain to them who the audience ultimately is. Are you going to be passing on this proposal to someone at a higher level than you? Explain that to them and explain to them how that influences how this should be written up and what points should be specifically highlighted and reinforced. So make sure that they understand that this is a developmental opportunity for them, that this is important on a larger scale, and be extremely clear about your expectations If you have an expectation in terms of format or information covered or the goal. Are we trying to save money? Are we trying to impact safety or quality statistics? Are we trying to impact retention? Are we trying to make a customer happy? What is the goal? Help this person or these people understand the goal and the objective and how that is tied to their developmental plan, to their development plan.

Lisa:

Next, make sure we have regular check-ins. So if we've given someone a week to do a task, check in after a day or two, see where they are, see how it's going, see if they have questions, tell them this is due on Friday, but I want to see it on Tuesday so that I can give you feedback if you're getting off course at all. If you're giving someone a month or you're giving a team in this case the story I told you in this case the team had a month Maybe after a week we do a check-in and say I want to see what you've got. I want you to present to me an outline with the first three pages of your proposal. I want to understand your project plan on getting this done. I want to understand who you're talking to to do research or where you're doing your research online. I want an update so that if we need to do some course correction, we can and then maybe have a follow-up, and then what happens is, after you do that first check-in, you have an idea of how often you need to have check-ins between now and your deadline and build in some cushion. So, for example, if I see an outline and the first few pages of a project proposal and I understand the research plan and the research resources that are being used and I'm thinking, gosh, this is a great plan, this is 100% on target with what I expected, then maybe we go another week before we have another check-in so that we stay I stay up to date on the progress that's being made. On the other hand, if I feel like after that first check-in we are really off course, and if I feel like after that first check-in we are really off course, I may want to talk to the project leader every day or every other day for a few updates and so that I can do some in-the-moment coaching and give feedback so that we can do course corrections and stay on track towards success. So delegating is not dumping and walking away and forgetting about it until the task is due. Delegating is first very aligned with professional development goals and then we are also really still attached and engaged to what is happening and your role, my role, your role in this scenario is to coach, give feedback, guide and really shepherd this person towards success, supporting them towards the success with as much attention or as little attention as they need, based on their level of skill in the moment.

Lisa:

I want to talk for a minute about feedback, because I've talked about coaching, giving people feedback, when it came to the setting expectations and getting your employees to have manners, the situation or really getting your employees to do what you want them to do, and then also in relation to delegating a task. I've talked about coaching, giving feedback, really shepherding the process, and I like that metaphor because it talks about that maybe you're not actually doing it, but you're guiding it. You're captaining the ship right. I don't know if that's a word, captaining, I don't know but let's talk about giving feedback and coaching people. You want to, first of all, catch people doing things right, tell them what you really like. I have read that we need as much as three times the positive reinforcement and positive feedback that we get in relation to one times of constructive feedback, and I know that's not proper English, but so we want to make sure we're really reinforcing what we like that somebody's doing.

Lisa:

Is someone showing initiative? Are they sharing information abundantly, are they staying on task? But there's a few things that you want them to do a little bit differently. Maybe in the example of the project proposal, there are a few more people they need to talk to, or there are a few more things that they need to consider or pay a little bit more attention to a specific goal. What is it that they need to do? Because you have the bigger picture and they don't. So it's your responsibility to support them and really set them up for success, and one of the ways that you do that is by making sure that you give people an abundance of positive reinforcement and to be authentic and very sincere about that positive reinforcement, because your goal, when you're coaching someone and you're helping them learn, is to maintain their self-esteem. You want to maintain their self-esteem. It is not your goal to tear someone down or have them feel negative about themselves. They're doing a good job, they're a good person, but they're learning. So we want to be patient and make sure that we tell them clearly you're doing great. I really appreciate the effort. I appreciate your initiative. I appreciate you doing most of these things right. We're just going to tweak a little bit and help you overcome a few things to make this even better. Even better. Love those words.

Lisa:

Okay, so we've talked about one question I had. Came in that said how can I get my employees to have manners Really, how do we get them to do anything? And what do I do when a task or a project that I've delegated comes back? It's the last minute and it's really not presentable. And so we've talked through those two questions. I've got another question that I received from again one of my VIP one-on-one coaching clients. She said you know, there's a click among some of the leaders at work. There's this little click, and I'm wondering how I become part of that click. They make decisions, they are empowered, they have each other's backs, and I want to be part of that click. Let me tell you some tips, and then I'm wait till the end because I'm going to share with you a freebie I have for you today that's going to really flesh out and expand this conversation.

Lisa:

What I've observed is that, as people move up in their careers and have more and more leadership responsibility, there's a big shift in their success, being enabled by their ability to build relationships, to build relationships, their ability to build relationships, which means really inspiring trust in others and being able to influence others and developing a camaraderie, whereas someone, early in their career, as an individual contributor and maybe even as a supervisor or a first-level manager Whereas that person's success really depended on task accomplishment. As they advance in their careers and move to higher and higher levels of responsibility in their career, what really becomes important is building those relationships, and that's where you see people being part of cliques. That really means that they have built those relationships. And so if you see a clique and it's five or six people and these people socialize together and they have those hallway conversations together and they make sure that each other are invited to the right meetings and all of that, it really is because they have those bonds and they have developed that trust and they know that they have each other's backs and they can talk to each other and communicate openly and they know that other person will do that with them. So that's not easy to do. That takes some time and it takes small steps every day to be able to build that type of foundation and relationship with your colleagues. You don't have to be in love with these people, you don't have to be best friends, you don't have to go on vacations together, but you do need to have that level of trust and that bond and be a person that others want to collaborate with. It helps to be fun to be around. It helps if you help other people and if you learn how to influence instead of being directive and telling people what they're going to do. It's a paradox that as we get more responsibility in our careers, we actually have less opportunity to just be directive and tell someone what to do. So we have to learn to influence. Let me tell you a little bit about influencing, and then I'm going to talk about the freebie a little bit.

Lisa:

Let me share a story with you from my own experience. There was a time when I was working at a region office for a manufacturing company and sometimes some of the leaders from our corporate office in another state would come to our location and tell us what we were going to do. Maybe it was a new program we were going to roll out or a new policy we were going to roll out, and they would come in and tell us what we were going to do and bonus how we were going to do it. That never feels good. I was talking about this recently with one of my clients and she was saying oh yeah, I've had that too and everybody resents it and resists it. Because, instead of being pulled along, you're being pushed along and you're being told, like I said, what you're going to do, how you're going to do it, what the timeline is, what tools you're going to use, and you're not engaged in the process. Now let's flip that around.

Lisa:

What if someone comes from corporate and says we're thinking about implementing this new policy. We want your thoughts on it. Is it necessary? How would you do it? What do you see? Do you see any value in this new policy and, if so, what in particular do you think is most valuable about this new policy? Because we really want to reinforce that when we roll it out. What if someone asked what tools do you think would be valuable to use in this new policy or new procedure or new process? What if the people from corporate came down and had some focus groups and gathered ideas and input and got people engaged? And my goodness, what if people got excited about this new rollout, this new policy, this new thing happening?

Lisa:

Whatever it is, that is influencing. That is influencing. That is how you pull people along, instead of pushing them along. That is influencing. You get people engaged from the very beginning. You ask questions, you listen, you ask for clarification, you ask people about what is in this for them, what are the benefits for them, how can this benefit them and the greater team or company or division, how will this benefit everyone? And you lean into that. You lean into what you're saying and you become more of a facilitative leader instead of a dictatorial leader that says, like in that first scenario, here's what you're going to do and here's how you're going to do it and here are the tools that you're going to use. That gives everybody the heebie-jeebies Yep, that's it heebie-jeebies. Nobody likes that. That type of behavior always brings on resistance. So remember, ask questions, listen, engage people early, get their ideas. Sometimes people will have great ideas and can use those and that will help them to be engaged and vested in the success of what it is that you're doing. Now you've got people on board supporting you. It's such a different scenario. There are more ways to influence people, and I'm going to talk a little bit today about an amazing book that is a classic. It's an oldie, but a goodie. About an amazing book that is a classic. It's an oldie but a goodie, and I just love the book by Dale Carnegie how to Win Friends and Influence People.

Lisa:

I was in junior college when a professor of mine recommended that I read this book. That was a long time ago and I'm glad I read it and I've never forgotten it and I'm so grateful that professor recommended the book to me. It and I've never forgotten it, and I'm so grateful that professor recommended the book to me. It has lots and lots of tips about being influencing and building the kind of trust and collaboration that you'll need more and more as you take on more leadership responsibilities. And those leadership responsibilities might be at your job, they might be in your family, your community, your church, wherever you volunteer. But you need to be using leadership skills to make a difference in your life and have the influence that you want to have in your life. So this book how to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie it's still available. It's on Amazon, I think it's on Kindle, I think it's on Kindle, I think it's on Audible, I think it's everything.

Lisa:

But I've made a cheat sheet for you today, a one-pager that outlines pretty much the whole book on how to win friends and influence people, and I've got a link to it today in the show notes where you can go. Yep, and I'm going to ask you to enter your email address. I can put you on my newsletter so you get information and updates all the time. You can always unsubscribe I will never spam you, but go ahead, give me your email address, sign up. Maybe you'll like the newsletter and get a lot out of it, because I just keep sharing tips and freebies and resources with my newsletter audience every week or so, and this is a great opportunity for you to sign up and download this one pager that will share more information and tips for you on winning friends and influencing people everywhere in your life, because we all need support, we all need to be engaged with others and to have a strong social support system, so don't miss this freebie. There are 30 different tips on how to win friends and influence people on this one pager, and those tips are broken into four different categories Techniques in handling people, six ways to make people like you win people to your way of thinking and be a leader. Those are the four categories, and there are tips in here for everyone. I'm sure there's something in here that will help you.

Lisa:

You know, sometimes we talk about wanting to be respected more than wanting to be liked. As we develop more and more responsibilities as leaders in our corporate lives, it is important to be likable. We see it in politics, we see it in culture. We hear people talking about whether or not someone wants to have a beer with somebody. For years, I heard that the litmus test was whether or not someone wanted to go to lunch with you. It is important to be likable. That's not everything. You need the whole package. But these tips on this sheet about helping people to like you and see your value and like to be around you is very valuable for your career. So get this one pager today. Click on the link and download it and, before you know it, you are going to be part of whatever clique it is that you want to be part of. You know that it is my goal to help you accelerate your success and to do that with as little stress as possible and as much joy and fulfillment as possible, and one of the ways that you do this is through your leadership.

Lisa:

I talked about leadership and the key skills of leadership in episode 9. And now here we are in episode 10, answering some of your questions and giving a few more tips. Remember, you're going to set clear expectations of your team members. You're going to coach and give feedback. You're going to remember that delegating is not dumping. You're still responsible. So you're going to remember that delegating is not dumping. You're still responsible. So you're going to be engaged and you are going to learn to influence others and be part of whatever clique it is that you want to be part of. And the more successful you are, I know, the greater your sphere of influence is, and that is for the greater good for you in your career, in your job, in your personal life and beyond, and it benefits you and it benefits others.

Lisa:

Next week, I'm going to talk a little bit about you finding your dream job. What would be your next dream job? Maybe this job that you're in is great and you love it, but in three or four or five years you're going to move on. So let's talk about what that process is going to look like and be sure to tune in.

Lisa:

Remember, if you did not download my Leadership 101 worksheet last week, you need to download that. It's got some of the key characteristics of successful leaders, so I've got the link to that Leadership 101 worksheet in my show note and also remember that I have a Leadership 101 online course coming up and I've got a wait list for it. The wait list is going to get the first information about the course before everybody else, so be sure to get on that wait list so that you get all the information early and you get access to the early bird pricing. Don't miss it. The link to the wait list is in the show notes. I can't wait to hear what you think of the tips and the downloads I'm sharing with you today. Go ahead and send me a DM and let me know what you think. And do you have more leadership questions or career questions? Go ahead and send me a DM or an email. I love hearing from you. Thank you for listening. Now go melt the glass ceiling.

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Lisa M. Liszcz, Ph.D.

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